it hurts more in the daytime
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Randomize
