I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We are two peas in an std pod
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize