do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
