i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
