someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
