Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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