You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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