hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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