Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
