I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
