I want to stick my p in your. b.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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