i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
