When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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