i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you would pick up someone in the library
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I understand Curling. That high.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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