id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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