ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
