i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
