uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
