Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
