My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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