fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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