Betty ford says i'm here all night
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
