Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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