I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
