The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
