She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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