used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
