What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Then you guys just all showered together...?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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