Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
