Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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