Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
