I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You have to summon your inner elephant
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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