There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
