Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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