can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
