u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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