It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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