Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
