You made me cry and you don't even care
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
That accounts for only three of the penises
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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