Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
