so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
