he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
