Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
