life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize