True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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