rhymes with "ouble enetration"
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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