Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize