why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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