just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
