why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
